The Watchtower of Destruction: The Ferrett's Journal - I Get Around (Round Round, I Get Around)

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February 2nd, 2007
10:33 am

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I Get Around (Round Round, I Get Around)
The people I have not friended are always shocked when I tell them that I know who they are. But I read people, I really do.

See, I don't read everybody (I tried to, but that got out of hand). But I read a lot more of the folks who read me than they'd ever know. See, if you leave a comment and I'm in the right mood, I'll often click through and read the front page of your journal just to see what you're up to. Sometimes I click over because it's a particularly funny comment and I want to know who this is, and sometimes you've commented enough that I just want to see how you're doing, and sometimes I'm just bored while I'm waiting for something to process.

I don't friend you, because I'm stuffed to the gills with friends as it is. And I usually don't say anything, because I will not comment unless I have something new or funny to contribute to the discussion. And most journals don't have a lot that inspires great replies from me; I mean, "Sorry your life sucks because you missed the bus to work yesterday" doesn't seem like the sort of thing that's worth typing up, nor is "That MP3 cozy is cool."

It's not that I'm not interested, but a generic expression of acknowledgement just isn't my bag. I like to comment when it's interesting.

But I visit a lot. When I talked to people at Arisia, they were sometimes shocked by the fact that I did know them. When zarhooie was here, she refused to believe me.

I'm tempted to run around and be a blazing egomaniac. Whenever I read someone, regardless of what I have to say, just leave a comment on their first entry in big letters:

THE FERRETT WAS HERE



And just leave. If someone replies to my comment, I'll ignore 'em. The point is not that I am encouraging dialogue, just to let them know that the Hand of the Invisible Weasel has touched them, quietly, and moved on.

I see all. I just don't always say. But I am watching you, my children. Oh yes.

(142 shouts of denial | Tell me I'm full of it)

Comments
 
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From:littlebluedog
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:35 pm (UTC)
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... just to let them know that the Hand of the Invisible Weasel has touched them, quietly, and moved on.

Something like this happens to me on the bus most mornings ... so I'll pass, thanks man. ;)
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From:kellyfaerie
Date:February 2nd, 2007 05:07 pm (UTC)
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I was thinking I'd need to bring out the doll and let everyone show where they'd been touched...
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From:bart_calendar
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:37 pm (UTC)
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Shit. Thanks for posting.

I've been wondering why I've been feeling the evil eye lately.
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From:stripedsocks
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:38 pm (UTC)
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Ha ha! That would amuse me to no end, let me tell you. ^_^
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From:stealingbabies
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:39 pm (UTC)
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Kind of like jassalol's BOOBIES!! everywhere? I have to admit, I'm the kind of person that's easily entertained by things like that.
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From:jfargo
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:56 pm (UTC)
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Exact thing I was thinking. I'm also easily amused by these antics, so the idea of Ferrett stamping this on livejournals and never checking back makes me laugh. Besides, some people really just want the validation of knowing that SOMEONE was at their journal, even if it's not to read. I may not be one of those people, but you know they're out there, and this "stamp" would give them some kind of warm glow.

Or am I overthinking this?
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From:vrax
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:39 pm (UTC)
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WTF? She refused to believe you? Seems odd, doesn't it?
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From:miripanda
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:41 pm (UTC)
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I think that would be HILARIOUS if you just left calling cards like that....and you could develop a whole system..like the Victorians used to do...if they left a card, and the upper right hand corner was folded down, it meant the call should be returned...if the lower left hand corner was folded down, it meant the visitor was angry...the lower right hand corner meant something like "just stopping by."...I don't remember what the upper left hand corner was for..maybe it meant "send naked pictures."
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From:theferrett
Date:February 2nd, 2007 07:20 pm (UTC)
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I like that. I may do that.
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From:wickedsin
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:44 pm (UTC)
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nice!
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From:richlayers
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:45 pm (UTC)
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I feel oddly comforted by this....
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From:e_scapism101
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:46 pm (UTC)
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Hand of the Invisible Weasel...now why do I have a sudden urge to watch old, badly dubbed Kung Fu movies today?
From:galalefey
Date:February 2nd, 2007 09:20 pm (UTC)
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You must use your hamster style!
From:clothing5
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:48 pm (UTC)
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So the question now is, Do you actually read the entires on your flist? I have just under 100 people on my friends list and I barely skim most of it. Is my name mentioned? No...ok. Is there a link? No...moving on. Does it mention someone I don't know...yes? Moving way on. I only have about 10 people on my flist that i actually READ read.
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From:jfargo
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:00 pm (UTC)
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Then why do you have the extra people that you don't bother reading? This isn't snark, I really am just curious. I tend to only keep people on flist if I read them, and I have 98 people on there right now, looking for more.
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From:twirlandswirl
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:53 pm (UTC)
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BUT OMG NO COMMENTS? BALEEEEETE!

*cough*

Sorry. Had to get that out there. I've got ~350 people on my friends list, and as a third year college student trying to get ready to apply to law school, yeah... my commenting isn't at 100%. I think by now I've gotten rid of most of the "comment or I delete you" types... mostly because my reply (a comment, ironically enough) is, "k, bye!" because I don't feel the need to prove my readership.

But I admire your ability to even partially keep up with all the people who've friended you. ;) It's like there needs to be an IRON MAN LJ award or some such....
From:stockdude
Date:February 2nd, 2007 05:00 pm (UTC)
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Firefox is good at avoiding viruses if you're downloading porn, but what sucks about it is that you can't cut and paste easily. Like, I copy a link from somewhere, log into e-mail, and then try to paste the link, and there's no paste option. So at work, it's all Explorer for me.
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From:drd2be
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:53 pm (UTC)
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Creeeeeepy.
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From:greektoomey
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:55 pm (UTC)
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If you've read my journal, I apologize for the lack of remarkable entries.
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From:kmg_365
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:57 pm (UTC)
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Dude, you misspelled "WUZ" there.

You can thank me later. ;-)
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From:pleepleus
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:00 pm (UTC)
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Shouldn't it be something more like

"I am in urz lj reading ur posteses"
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From:harroldsheep
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:58 pm (UTC)
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THE FERRETT WAS HERE

and yet, i feel strangely aroused.
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From:pleepleus
Date:February 2nd, 2007 03:59 pm (UTC)
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*wonders if posting my own 'milf' pics would draw a comment out of theferrett*

I kid, I kid. Kudos for attempting to read even a portion of your non flist friends. a few thousand LJ's and comments would be more than a full time job. Perhaps it's time for another of your famous "Post a link to something you wrote you think is interesting/shows who you are/you wanna share with the class" posts?
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From:theferrett
Date:February 2nd, 2007 07:36 pm (UTC)
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The problem is that I got overwhelmed with those, too. I still occasionally go back to the last one, but man. That's a lot of things to read.
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From:anaraug
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:01 pm (UTC)
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You're totally allowed to post that on mine. I rarely comment also...
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From:eli_l
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:01 pm (UTC)
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(I'm odd, so bare with me.) I was just picturing you going on even a bigger ego trip and tagging women you have slept with with the same line. :D
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From:theferrett
Date:February 2nd, 2007 07:39 pm (UTC)
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I could.

Won't, but I could.
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From:techempage
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:01 pm (UTC)
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~chuckles~

I wish we had taken a picture before we erased it.

But the first time you pimped Infusions of Grandeur I wrote a message on our whiteboard to inform ducttapeavenger. It said "We've been linked by TheFerrett!!!!" with multiple underlines. (The text in green and the underlines in red, if you were curious.)

Then when you posted the second time, due to the pop-rocks, ducttapeavenger added an "again!!" to the end with the same underlines.

Then my mom came over with my kids, "You've been what? Who's The Ferrett? Nevermind, I don't think I want to know."

So see, your invisible hand reaches out in strange and mysterious ways.
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From:theferrett
Date:February 2nd, 2007 07:39 pm (UTC)
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Well, there ya go. I hope the pimping was worth it.
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From:techempage
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:03 pm (UTC)
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And one more:

"But I visit a lot. When I talked to people at Arisia, they were sometimes shocked by the fact that I did know them."

I couldn't tell if you actually knew who I was or were being sarcastic, actually.
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From:mojo_iv
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:06 pm (UTC)
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Who are you and why are you on my friends list? :)

--m4
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From:greektoomey
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:06 pm (UTC)
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Aaaah... I've figured it out. This whole entry is an RHPS allusion.

"It's so dreamy
Oh, fantasy free me,
So you can't see me,
No, not at all.
In another dimension,
With voyeuristic intention,
Well secluded, I see all."
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From:kibbles
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:14 pm (UTC)
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Shit, now I feel obligated to be INTERESTING or something.

(Yeah, right.)
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From:silent_r_infork
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:18 pm (UTC)
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the Hand of the Invisible Weasel has touched them

So many possible innuendos, so little time.
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From:corwinok
Date:February 2nd, 2007 04:21 pm (UTC)
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Time for a "Touched by the Hand of the Invisible Weasel" banner you can distribute to websites you enjoy. Were I an artist, I would provide such an image myself, if only to be allowed to post it to my own site :D
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