The Watchtower of Destruction: The Ferrett's Journal - "Do People REALLY Call You Ferrett?"
June 10th, 2004
08:32 am

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"Do People REALLY Call You Ferrett?"
It's a question that irritates me. And I can give you no better response than the response I gave when asked it for the fifth time at the end of a long Magic tournament:

"When I am making sweet love to my wife," I said, "And she is moaning out in ecstacy and crying out my name, the name she cries is 'Ferrett.' Does that answer your question?"

They took the hint.

For the record, it's not my given name, and I don't push the Ferrett thing with my family because I don't want to be a dick. I might change my name legally, but my mother has said it would break her heart - and since technically my legal name was a gift from her to me, she is correct in that it would be loutish to return it. My employers sometimes call me by my legal name, especially when introducing me around, but they sign my check so they can call me whatever they want.

The rest of y'all? Ferrett. That's my name. Do wear it out, especially if it's in a hyperlink.

I'm such a hooer.

(77 shouts of denial | Tell me I'm full of it)

Comments
 
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From:xerxes_of_diren
Date:June 10th, 2004 12:36 pm (UTC)
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well its Your Name. personally i think thats pretty cool.
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From:shawnj
Date:June 10th, 2004 12:46 pm (UTC)
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I was a bit hesitant about it at first, but no I couldn't think of what else to call you.
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:04 pm (UTC)
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And hey, you were right. *g*
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From:bouncedreality
Date:June 10th, 2004 12:55 pm (UTC)
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My employers sometimes call me by my legal name, especially when introducing me around, but they sign my check so they can call me whatever they want.

It's amazing what people can get away with when they are the ones who give you money :)
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From:crystalvh
Date:June 10th, 2004 06:37 pm (UTC)
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In defense of those who sign your check, I must say that we are all getting better about calling you Ferrett...eventhough I resisted at first. And, if it makes you feel any better, your checks have your real name, but the check stub says "Ferrett." :-)
From:(Anonymous)
Date:June 10th, 2004 12:58 pm (UTC)
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It is a semi-normal question for me. After years in the SCA where I got used to people having other names, it is automatic for me to check to make sure that the use name in all contexts is the same. It isn't for me (I always go by my given name except where a use name is used so I'm Sir Myrdin the Just at events and such but use Michael when I call on the phone).

So when I met you in person I simply double-checked that it was the name you used and now you're "Ferrett" in that context as well.

It is your name, so that's one area I don't argue about. If you preferred to be called "Susan" and went by that, I would use Susan.

Michael
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From:donkey_hokey
Date:June 10th, 2004 12:59 pm (UTC)
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I have two names: my given and my adopted. I use my given name at work and when I'm paying bills. I use my adopted everyplace else.

It gets a little amusing when the two worlds meet (i.e. company picnics) - my husband has to remember to call me by my given name. And when I've "borrowed" people from work to help out with stuff like moving, I have to take them aside and explain about the adopted name. The day after my wedding, in which both my names were inscribed on the invitation, one of my invited coworkers asked if he should start calling me by my adopted name. I said NO, because I WANT to keep the given name strictly apart from business matters.

I've kept the names apart so successfully that when one of my husband's coworkers called and got the answering machine, with my given name in the message, she about had a heart attack - she thought that we'd divorced.
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From:astridsdream
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:17 pm (UTC)
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I understand a little of what you mean about having two names and having to keep them seperate. Not from personal experience, but of my friend Mike, aka P$ (pronounced pea-money). When he joined a certain club that I plug far too often there were already two other Mikes, each with their own nickname. After a couple months of searching, he was finally dubbed P$, and that's how most of the club knows him. However, there's another group of friends that refuses to call him P$. I'm part of the other group, but when I joined the club, I went along with everyone else and started calling him P$, except when I was with the other group of friends. So I know him by both names, and I have stories of stuff that happened when I was with each group. This makes life difficult for my storytelling skills, because there's a noticeable lag when I have to "translate" his name to match whatever group I'm telling the story to - if something happened and I was with people from the club, in the story he's called P$. But if I'm telling that story to someone from the other group, I "translate" his name to Mike. I don't have to, but that's how they know him, so that's what I try to do. Same the other way, translating Mike to P$, only there it's more crucial, 'cause, like I said, there's two other Mikes in the club. "So yeah, I was hanging out with Mike the other day..." "Who?"

Wow. That was long-winded and probably made no sense. Ah well.
From:kkrouner
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:12 pm (UTC)
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While I understand the irritation at hearing any question infinite times, try to put yourself in their shoes. They are probably mostly just curious as to what to call you, rather than mocking your decision. I picked up clues over time reading your writing and talking with you in person. I fancy myself a detective and always try to answer my own questions without taking the easy way out.

Anyway, lighten up on the poor peons, they don't know any better.

KK
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:05 pm (UTC)
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I know, I know; it was a little rude. But I figure hey, if I can tell people here, maybe they'll be less shocked in person and won't have to negotiate the proper method of discourse.

That was Heiss and Turian I said that to, though. I don't know if they remember.
From:pi216
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:14 pm (UTC)
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My sister, one Elizabeth by birth, has so successfully pushed her conversion to "Lizard" that her soccer trophies have been coming back with "Lizard" on them for most of her life, and in the last couple of years her HIGH SCHOOL AWARDS have, too.

I use the term 'unrepentantly weird' to describe her. But I smile when I do ;) .
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From:karnythia
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:16 pm (UTC)

Random person

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I wandered over from scarletdemon and I have this same argument with my family. I hate my middle name (it was supposed to be my first name, but since I got to fill out my birth certificate it's not) but one particular member of my family insists on using it anyway. I've resolved the issue by ignoring her at all times.
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:06 pm (UTC)

Re: Random person

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I can't ignore my family, though. I like them quite a bit....
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From:hjdevnull
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:19 pm (UTC)
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Is there anything anywhere you've already written that explains the origins of this name?
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:12 pm (UTC)
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It's on the FAQ page at theferrett.com. It's fairly boring, though. I wish I had a better origin story.
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From:snowelf
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:23 pm (UTC)
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"When I am making sweet love to my wife," I said, "And she is moaning out in ecstacy and crying out my name, the name she cries is 'Ferrett.' Does that answer your question?"

They took the hint.

Damn, I love you, Ferrett. If you weren't already married and I weren't already engaged, I'd have married you on the spot. *chuckles* I love smart-alecks. You ought to have a no drinking and surfing your journal rule...might save people's keyboards.
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From:rhapsody_98
Date:June 11th, 2004 01:49 am (UTC)
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I thought that was almost TMI, *giggle*
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From:zaliness
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:24 pm (UTC)
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so whats your legal name?
i dont remember if i ever knew it, or have just forgotten.
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From:donkey_hokey
Date:June 10th, 2004 02:49 pm (UTC)
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Go to Ferrett's user info page, and click on the link for his published LAN Party book.
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From:blergeatkitty
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:25 pm (UTC)
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I got called "Blerg" in bed once, and only once.

However, I think I'm fast on my way to the same place you are with your nickname, given the increasing number of friends who call me Blerg to my face. It's easier, given that, like about a third of all girls born between 1977 and 1985, my first name is Jessica.

I never quite forgave my mom for calling me Jessica, especially since she thought she was naming me something unusual.
From:pi216
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:29 pm (UTC)
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"Blerg", in bed? Heeheehee. "Oh, Blerg, Blerg me like you've never Blerged before!" And Smurf me a glass of Smurf while you're at it.
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From:pi216
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:28 pm (UTC)
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Oh, and hanging out for four years in a game store, there were a LOT of duplicate names. We went with seniority over who got to 'keep' their name when they began hanging out, and who had to assume a different one for in-store use, when we didn't just use preferred screen-names from games. There was only one other "Tim", and he went by "Timmy", anyway, but well more than half the time I was "Nygel" or "Cookiemonster" (name of my Everquest troll, shush), or "Pi".

There was the distinct social advantage with those, however, of people usually being able to guess that they weren't our REAL names. Well, I got asked "You're named Nigel?" a lot.
From:da_judge1
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:30 pm (UTC)
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If one visits New Orleans and the ever-wonderful Bourbon Street, special attention should be paid. On quiet nights with relatively little noise or customer traffic, the quiet moans of shot girls can be heard through the dark streets of the French Quarter. All of their sweet voices calling out for "The Ferrett"...
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From:scouseboy
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:47 pm (UTC)
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Either that, or they're begging for the return of Dave and Nick...
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From:saoba
Date:June 10th, 2004 01:47 pm (UTC)
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One social group I belonged to had multiple Mikes so we used other names (SCA names, fannish nics, online handles, ect).

But there was always a New Mike.

At one point the New Mike suggested he be called something else.

"You're the New Mike. That is how everyone thinks of you. There's SCA Name Mike, Fannish Nic Mike, Really Tall Mike, Online Handle Mike... and until there is a Newer Mike, you are New Mike. If you want to, you can bring us a new New Mike."

After a minute he said, "So, it's not a name, it's a job description? Okay. There'll be a new New Mike within six weeks."

And there was.
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:30 pm (UTC)
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Okay, that's hysterical. I LOVE that.
From:ruisenora
Date:June 10th, 2004 02:09 pm (UTC)
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Heehee.. My boyfriend calls me "Meww" in bed.. It's my initials and how I introduce myself. I dislike my real name, but I won't change it.. My mom's sensitive about that 'cause she added "Mary" to my name when I was 16 months old since she and my dad couldn't agree on a nickname for "Elizabeth." (My aunt is already a "Beth.") It still embarrases her and she's begged me to not change my name.

Everyone at school and work calls me "Meww." My family doesn't, really, and it confuses the hell out of me and my friends. *sigh* I actually had someone for Orientation Leaders yell at me 'cause I wanted to use "Meww" on my shirt. :-\ I called her superior, though, and won. Yay for me! :-P
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From:ravenblack
Date:June 10th, 2004 02:23 pm (UTC)
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I did legally change my name to match my 'use name'. Never liked my given name, thought of myself as my 'use name', then someone on a newsgroup said "why do you hide behind a screen name? Why not use your real name?"

So I changed my real name to my screen name, and, because it's a silly name, there is still a chance of "why do you hide behind a screen name?", but now I can say "I don't, it's my real name".

And then they don't believe me, but that's okay because that just means they're wrong, and I win. I also get to amuse people when I, for example, sign up for library cards.
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:37 pm (UTC)
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See, now that's cool.
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From:nikkie_noo
Date:June 10th, 2004 02:43 pm (UTC)
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I find it gets to the point where a true nickname just becomes a part of you, an extension of yourself that somehow seems more real and personal than your own name could ever be. I almost pity people who don't have that one special little name that seems to encompass who you are. Nikkie may be my given name, but Noo I have always been, and Noo I shall remain 'till the day I die. ;)
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From:cuprohastes
Date:June 10th, 2004 03:01 pm (UTC)
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I'm less interestested in whether you're called "Ferret" RL, than what type of ferret you think of when you think of yourself?
I mean, there's different flavours of ferret, colours, personality, and so on.

Then again, why not change your name from Mr. X Y to Mr. X Ferret Y?
Or is that still being ungrateful about your name?
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:38 pm (UTC)
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I think of me as a me ferrett. Not an animal. But jumpy.

The X Y Ferrett isn't being ungrateful, but it feels like a half-measure to me. Ferrett's what I identify as, and if I would go to the trouble of legally changing my name, I wouldn't want it at the back of the line.
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From:kid_lit_fan
Date:June 10th, 2004 03:21 pm (UTC)
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"When I am making sweet love to my wife," I said, "And she is moaning out in ecstacy and crying out my name, the name she cries is 'Ferrett.' Does that answer your question?"


DOES it? I find it hard to believe that many people don't say "Nuh-UHHH!" People find it very hard to accept the unconventional, but maybe the force of your personality shuts 'em up.

My given name is Lisabeth, nickname Beth. For some reason, when I am introduced to people, usually as Beth, a noticeable number of them (a couple of dozen over the years) call me Liz. I do not feel like a Liz, and since my full first name is pronounced Lisa Beth, Liz is not even a part of my name. I wouldn't mind as MUCH if they called me Lisa, but why go through the thought process of "Beth, hmmm, that's a nickname for Elizabeth, therefore, I shall choose another nickname and use that one, since obviously the person who introduced her is LYING!!!"?

It's a peeve, yeah.
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From:karou_windstalk
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:10 pm (UTC)
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Honestly, I can understand about the given name thing .. but, in my case, I honestly wouldn't mind changing it, if I ever really felt the need.

For all of you who read this and are considering having children .. please consider the effects on said child when they're not just named for their relative, but they're a jr, 3rd, 4th, or wose, 5th...

Yes, that's right, I share my given name with not only my father, but his father, and his father ..
which makes me George V. Woodrow IV

Now, there's another kicker, the middle name was added to my great-grandfather's name as a favor to a bishop, or some nonsense like hat, so I honestly wouldn't mind losing that part permanently.

As for which name I'll answer to? I will answer to both my given name as well as my on-line handle(s) .. Though more Karou nowadays than Saski .. as Karou has become more 'me' ....

Now, would I go through the insanity of legally changing my name to 'Karou WindStalker' .. I honestly can't say .. but I do know there won't be a George V Woodrow V, even if my fiancé and I have more than one child.
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From:scarletdemon
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:18 pm (UTC)
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When I'm in bed with my husband and moaning in ecstacy, I shout "Ferrett" too. My husband is REALLY pissed off with you.
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From:theferrett
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:41 pm (UTC)
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You know, I hear that an awful lot.
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From:quizzicalsphinx
Date:June 10th, 2004 04:51 pm (UTC)
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::bursts out laughing:: When I first started 'blogging on DeadJournal, the most popular question used to be "Is your husband's name really Grendel?" Of course it isn't! But Grendel's the name he was introduced to me by, and Grendel is, indeed, the name I call out at the height of passion.
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From:mikester
Date:June 10th, 2004 05:15 pm (UTC)
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That's why I picked "mikester" as my BBS handle, lo these many years ago. It's close enough to my real name (two-thirds of it, anyway) that I don't mind if people call me that in real life. And, yes, people I know from my BBS days still do. If I'd taken a name like, I don't know, "HackPirate2000," that'd be a little harder to take on a regular basis.
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From:sageautumn
Date:June 10th, 2004 05:44 pm (UTC)

I know my own name, thanks.

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I get people that argue with me.

Sage Autumn is, in fact, my real name. Yes. REALLY. Yes, it's on my birth certificate. Yes, my mother gave it to me. Yes, yes yes yes yes. I didn't have a damned thing to do with it (not to say I dislike the name--it's fine).

But unfailingly, even though my online name _isn't_ SageAutumn or anything related to it... (online I'm Sigh) I get people that argue with me.

What's your real name? Sage Autumn.

No, I mean... really. Yes, really. Just like it says.

I mean what your family calls you. Yeah, I know what you mean. That's my name. But sometimes they call me Sagie-poo, too.

It's on your real birth certificate? YES. Geeeez.

I have, at times, tried agreeing with them and trying to get them to tell me what my name is (since, I guess they know since I so obviously don't), but the sarcasm tends to be utterly lost.
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From:zoethe
Date:June 10th, 2004 05:51 pm (UTC)

Re: I know my own name, thanks.

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My mother wanted to name me Misty Dawn. My father would have nothing to do with it - "Sounds like a name for a damned horse!"

At moments like this, I am very grateful to my father.
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