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A Brief Review Of That New Female-Designed Dating App - The Watchtower of Destruction: The Ferrett's Journal
December 21st, 2015
10:31 am

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A Brief Review Of That New Female-Designed Dating App

So the CEO of Siren got tired of seeing the endless floods of abuse that tormented women on OKCupid.  She asked, “If I were going to design a dating app to be friendly to women, how would I do that?”

Her answer was fascinating.  And when I read about it, I said, “Let’s download the app and give it a shot.”

Which was a little weird: it is only an app. The old-school dude in me is like, “…where’s my web page?” and Siren says, “Fuck your web page, man, we all work off of mobile anyway, just love the app.”  Okay, sure, not a big deal, since everything at Siren is designed to work in 140-character snippets.

(Cue the usual foaming rants of Twitter-length writing restrictions. Yet remember, I like Twitter. 140 characters is enough to get precisely one (1) point across, which forces people to be succinct and encourages witty brevity – two things that are good for a dating app where people are browsing heavily.)

The app starts out strong: you create a user account (which is relatively painless – you have to give it a phone number to avoid spam and sock accounts, then email/password), and then you enter a 140-character description of yourself. (I went with “Polyamorous, science-fiction-writin’, nerdy-ass punster.”)

And it asks whether you’re a man, woman, or nonbinary.

And it asks whether you’re trans and/or willing to date trans people.

So hey, SJW credentials: established.

Yet asking for trans and nonbinary stuff is pretty trivial database stuff.  So here’s the first major digression from the norm:

If this was OKCupid or some other dating site, I’d give you a link to my profile.  But on Siren, people’s profiles are not visible to you unless you fit their criteria.  Even if I could link to my page – and remember, this is a mobile app, so I can’t – you would not be able to see me unless you were, in my case, a woman between the ages of 21 and 66 within 250 miles of me.

Which is a protective screening, really: You can’t even know I exist unless I’m specifically looking for someone like you.  Which means that dudes can’t go around looking for every pretty lesbian within 250 miles and spam the shit out of them.

…Well, actually, they couldn’t do that anyway, because you can’t search users.

“So how do you find people, Ferrett?”, you may ask.  And Siren’s organized around one central feature: The Question Of The Day.  They get some pseudo-celebrity to ask something like, “If you could only eat one meal for the rest of eternity, what would it be?” or “Which dead author would you want to take to dinner?” – and you get to see the 140-character answers from people only who match both your criteria and theirs.

Answering these little snippets is reasonably addictive.  It’s fun – well, for me, anyway – seeing how witty you can be in such a small space.

The intent is that you’re trying to start a fun conversation, and you only choose the people who have answers you like. If you enjoy someone’s answers, you ping them and start chatting in private…

Or try to.  Currently, Siren is only marketed to Seattle, so when I selected “Within 50 miles of Cleveland,” there was only one person answering questions – or, to be more precise, only one person answering questions who I was potentially compatible with.  Pushing that out to a thousand-mile radius got me up to about 44 answers, but I suspect most of those people are West Coasters.

Which is the only thing that makes me suspicious of Siren’s success – it’s a numbers game, the same way some towns have a lot of restaurant ratings on Yelp! and so Yelp is super-useful in those towns, and in others nobody does a damn thing and so Yelp is this broken, pitiful tool.  And while Yelp is a place where you can go to be a social media star, where people fawn over your witty reviews, Siren closed-mouthed nature discourages stardom.  You can be popular to a narrow set of people who want to know you, but your audience is always limited.

Which is a good thing for the sorts of conversations they want to start up – I just wonder whether it’ll allow the app to get to the point where it has the critical mass of a usable user base in any given town.

And the QOTD seems to be, like, Twitter, very in the moment – if you’re not answering today, you might as well be forgotten.  That seems to be something by design, though, so people who aren’t actively participating won’t get continually pinged.

That said, I currently have no idea how well the social aspect of it works!  As of this morning, I have no emails – though like I said, the user base is small out in my neck of the woods, and I just got started.

What we have with Siren is a different sort of dating app.  There will be a lot of people who read this experience, doubtlessly, and go “Ugh. That sounds awful.” And great! Let it be awful, for you. But a successful user experience doesn’t have to appeal to everyone, or even a minority of folks – just a large enough swathe of people to gather the right folks together to start smoochin’.

I like the idea of Siren, anyway.  I’ll probably answer some more questions.  And if they ever roll it out in my city, which I presume involves advertisements and a fresh wave of PR, I’ll give it a fresh shot even if I’ve forgotten about it, because it’s all about those user numbers.

In the meanwhile, it’s a solid experiment.  I like the idea.  Let’s see where it goes.

Cross-posted from Ferrett's Real Blog.

This entry has also been posted at http://theferrett.dreamwidth.org/515803.html. You can comment here, or comment there; makes no never-mind by me.

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Comments
 
[User Picture]
From:cinema_babe
Date:December 21st, 2015 05:59 pm (UTC)
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I can see where 2 or 3 months in, operating in a relative incubator like Seattle, this will work the way they want it to. It will certainly induce some angels to open their wallets and throw money at it.

From a social experience standpoint, though, I'm curious to see what happens when (if) it goes national and they have a much larger database of users. Trolls and false personas are the bane of online dating and no one has found a foolproof way around that. Also, safeguards that might be in place work a lot better when you have a largely socially homogenous group as opposed to a more diverse one.

Also, most online dating sites usually do show something close to a 50/50 split very early on but eventually evolve into overrepresentation of one gender or the other.

If they keep it as a boutique site and limit the scope of its membership, they might be abe to keep the site working the way they intend. I suspect if hey try to take it larger, it will be a lot harder. I mean once two people connect, a guy (or woman for that matter) can turn out to be a real psycho, creating multiple profiles and gaining people's trust for some nefarious reason or another.

It's a noble experiment that I'll be keeping an eye on.
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From:alexmegami
Date:December 22nd, 2015 07:55 pm (UTC)
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The phone number thing might *help*, at least - it's another step of effort to get, say, a Google phone number that the average troll won't want to do.
From:anonymousalex
Date:December 21st, 2015 06:31 pm (UTC)
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I have exactly zero experience with online dating, so take this for what it's worth.

It sounds like a good idea to me. The concept of, essentially, marketing myself to potential matches and/or reviewing their marketing efforts seems inherently unpleasant. I'm not sure if this is the alternate model for me, but having alternate models is something I am in favor of.

That said, the thing that caught my eye in the article was that their model is to "emulate 'an awesome dinner party.'" Which seems great, if you're the type who enjoys dinner parties.

Also, I am old, so my response to "we all work off of mobile anyway" is "what you mean 'we,' kemosabe?"

-Alex
From:serakit
Date:December 22nd, 2015 12:15 am (UTC)
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Given how easily you can get a Google Voice number these days, to what extent does providing a phone number actually accomplish that?
[User Picture]
From:alexmegami
Date:December 22nd, 2015 07:56 pm (UTC)
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It's an extra step of effort with pretty low payoff, I think.
[User Picture]
From:delosd
Date:December 23rd, 2015 10:33 pm (UTC)
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Yes, I read a recent article about Siren too, and was quite curious. You've given considerably more detail than the article I saw did. It does sound like an excellent concept, and definitely addresses some of the classic "pain points" of online dating. I might give it a try if it does go effectively nationwide.

I have no real idea whether it will work long term or not, but I applaud the founders' initiative and ideas. Most time when you "break the paradigm", you wind up losing your shirt, but even now and then that is where the really big changes come from. Wishing them luck with their endeavour.
[User Picture]
From:funwithrage
Date:December 23rd, 2015 11:36 pm (UTC)
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Pictures? Physical attributes? Because if the app's assumption that women care only about the mind and soul, I'm going to be somewhat irked.

ETA, having read the article: Okay, pictures are optional. Which...meh. Here's the thing with that: if I'm in this for a sexual relationship of any sort, and we start with the chatting and then move to pictures, the odds that I'll have to have an unfortunate and awkward "well, now that I've seen you...no. Sorry," conversation skyrocket. Whereas on OKC or similar I could just pull a "gee sorry really don't think we click" face-saver.

Edited at 2015-12-23 11:38 pm (UTC)
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