The Watchtower of Destruction: The Ferrett's Journal - A Spoonful Of Jealous Makes The Poly Go ‘Round
A Spoonful Of Jealous Makes The Poly Go ‘Round|
|Date:||February 13th, 2012 08:03 pm (UTC)|| |
My partners mostly don't need this, which is good for me because it would be an artificial construct--I mostly don't feel it and in my personal ethos it would be wrong to, so if I did feel it I'd want to stamp it out. My love for them, to be healthy, must mean that I want the best for them, even if that best isn't me.
There are other ways to say I value the time I spend with my partners than by expressing envy of the happiness they experience with other people (which is again good because that's not what I feel or think). For example, I express my happy anticipation of an upcoming visit, or that it's been too long since our last visit.
The last thing I want is for my partners to feel anxiety that I might leave! Why would I want them to feel anxious? I want them to be secure in my affection and in their place in my life.
Partly because, while I value the time I spend with any given person, I only value it so much: there's nobody with whom I really want to spend every day. So you being all "I had this awesome date on Saturday!" makes me feel good about my own awesome date on Saturday. Or my awesome stay-in-and-play-Bioware-games evening, or whatever.