The Watchtower of Destruction: The Ferrett's Journal - Once Again, The Real World Disappoints

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August 21st, 2008
12:31 pm

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Once Again, The Real World Disappoints
A man called Usain Bolt is breaking world records. And yet he has not yet a) donned a spandex costume,and b) found a way to use his fantastic sprinting powers to fight crime.

The man's name is "Bolt," for God's sake! In the crappiest Marvel comic, the man would already have his girlfriend stuffed into a refrigerator, found that with great speed comes great responsibility, and faced down Dr. Doom. Yet all the man does is, you know, run fast.

What a world, what a world.

(Tell me I'm full of it)

Comments
 
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From:[info]meihua
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:34 pm (UTC)
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*giggles* I'm with you there. Indeed, what a world.
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From:[info]pinwiz
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:35 pm (UTC)
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If Usain Bolt married Moxie Crimefigher Jillette she'd be Moxie Crimefighter Bolt. One runs fast, the other busts crime. It's a match made in heaven!

Sorry. I had to.
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From:[info]sacramentalist
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:37 pm (UTC)
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STEVE BOLT!
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From:[info]tsgeisel
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:37 pm (UTC)
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Starting an origin story like this is perfectly reasonable. There's still plenty of time for great tragedy to transform him.

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From:[info]icelator
Date:August 22nd, 2008 02:10 am (UTC)
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*deep Narrator voice*
All he ever wanted to do was run... *shot of olympic win*
All they wanted was him to stop *shot of mafia men trying to coerce him to throw the race*
Well he's not running anymore.. *Music starts and show montage of some masked man defeating mobsters*

He is Bolt.

Coming November 2009.
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From:[info]trinity3x
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:37 pm (UTC)
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I hate watching him preen for the cameras because he's so god damn arrogant. I know, I know. With the records he's breaking he deserves to be, but please save some of the gloating for private.
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From:[info]sageautumn
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:57 pm (UTC)

All that, and modest too!!

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I find it interesting to see his reactions vs. Phelps. And I find it very interesting that while I'm rather annoyed with Bolt's attitude, my husband is irrated by Phelps (seemingly) good-naturedness/graciousness.

Hmm... I was also surprised by our differing reactions to Dix's reaction to be 'bumped' up to bronze (after two disqualifications.) (Dix said, "I still lost.") I found it slightly sweet, and sort of sad... where my husband was very "well, he's right."

What I can't figure out (nor, honestly, have I given much thought to) is if it's a gender thing, a racial/culture thing, or just different people's reactions. I would guess it's probably a bit of all of those.
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From:[info]frawg_angel
Date:August 21st, 2008 05:17 pm (UTC)

Re: All that, and modest too!!

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I am also very annoyed with Bolt's attitude. When I saw people celebrating the victory, I like that... Phelps, other swimmers, other runners, even the gymnasts and divers. But what I find Bolt doing is, to me, disrespectful bordering very closely on unsportsmanlike, and just downright aggravating.

I want him to concentrate, I want him to think before the race, to prepare. But flashing his fingers, and preening for the cameras, doing things in the middle of the race or towards the end is driving me nuts. Sure he's fast, yes, he's broke records, but he's also exposed his character or rather lack thereof.
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From:[info]sageautumn
Date:August 21st, 2008 05:33 pm (UTC)

Re: All that, and modest too!!

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*laughs* The lack of concentration--before or after--doesn't bother me at all. If his laidback bit works for him (though from what I've seen it's getting stronger and stronger)... more power to him. And honestly, if it psyches out some of the other runners?... that's the mental game. I get that.

It's the... ..cockyness(?) of it that's annoying to me. It seems horridly immature. But I guess he probably is. He's young, and this is (I think?) one of the first times he's been on 'the big stage.'

And... well... *smirks* he sure can run.
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From:[info]street_person
Date:August 21st, 2008 07:28 pm (UTC)

Re: All that, and modest too!!

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It is painfully clear that both of you ladies are extremely turned on by Mr. Bolt.
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From:[info]lordkiev
Date:August 21st, 2008 07:04 pm (UTC)
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I think it might be worse to think that for all his preening for the cameras, he is in fact saving some of it for in private.
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From:[info]gfish
Date:August 21st, 2008 08:11 pm (UTC)
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...isn't competing in the Olympics arrogant by its very nature? They're all saying, by their very presence, that they think they might be the best in the world at some activity.
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From:[info]kisekinotenshi
Date:August 21st, 2008 10:48 pm (UTC)
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It's one thing to acknowledge your ability to do something as good as, if not better, than everyone else, and another to be arrogant about it. I find it more annoying when someone who is terrifically talented at something (and has worked very hard) belittles their accomplishments than someone being honest in admitting that they are in the top 1% of people in that particular field.
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From:[info]sacramentalist
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:41 pm (UTC)
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What you fail to realize is he DID defeat Dr Doom, but his girlfriend had died due to his arrogance and indecision. So he ran. He ran and ran. He ran so fast that his relative time reversed back to before she had perished.
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From:[info]paladincub21
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:47 pm (UTC)
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You know, his nickname, as in what all of Jamaica calls him is "Lightning."

So he's Usain "Lightning" Bolt.

But he does have a good useful career ahead of him.

If i need to have a handwritten note sent to someone 200 meters away, I am so using him.
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From:[info]icelator
Date:August 22nd, 2008 02:04 am (UTC)
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Oh Come on.

NOONE is that good at making paper airplanes.
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From:[info]sir_alf
Date:August 21st, 2008 04:49 pm (UTC)

Geek Point of Order

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The refrigerator thing was DC not Marvel.
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From:[info]delosd
Date:August 21st, 2008 11:17 pm (UTC)

Re: Geek Point of Order

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Darn it, you beat me to it! Yep, Kyle Rayner, Green Lantern.
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From:[info]beldar
Date:August 21st, 2008 05:08 pm (UTC)
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I'd rather have the real-world speedster than a superhero.

My first thought when I saw this was the "Bolt" character made by this guy from Vegas calling himself J-Bolt, who tried to sell a bunch of us on a CBR forum on his "Lightning Bolt Comics." He had deluded himself in to thinking he was a comics writer and publisher even though he had little more than an ashcan he started in the 1980s. (Even got an imdb listing for this movie he was allegedly making with another of his characters.) It was at the same time very sad and very funny to behold. I can't find his website anymore, so I guess the "Bolt" concept is up for grabs.
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From:[info]kathrynt
Date:August 21st, 2008 05:30 pm (UTC)
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What are you talking about? He wears a spandex outfit every time he runs!
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From:[info]alioth
Date:August 21st, 2008 05:47 pm (UTC)
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That was exactly what I was thinking.
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From:[info]rowena742
Date:August 21st, 2008 05:31 pm (UTC)
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"Not yet donned a spandex costume"? What's that neon-colored thing he wears for races, then?
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From:[info]magda_vogelsang
Date:August 21st, 2008 06:30 pm (UTC)
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My thought precisely.
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From:[info]tithenai
Date:August 21st, 2008 05:38 pm (UTC)
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I'd think that sprinting as a super power would be more conducive to fleeing crime scenes. Maybe he IS in the Marvelverse, but so speedy we haven't yet caught him in the act?
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From:[info]kidkappira
Date:August 21st, 2008 06:58 pm (UTC)
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He could form a team with former US Formula One driver Scott Speed.
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From:[info]bonerici
Date:August 21st, 2008 07:22 pm (UTC)
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obviously usain bolt is using a secret identity
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From:[info]dornbeast
Date:August 21st, 2008 07:38 pm (UTC)
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I thought that refrigerators were a DC specialty.
From:[info]llennhoff
Date:August 21st, 2008 07:57 pm (UTC)
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USain = "man from the US?" Obviously he's part of The World That's Coming.

Otherwise:

"Won medals. Girlfriend froze. Fight crime."
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