The Watchtower of Destruction: The Ferrett's Journal - The Obvious News Story

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December 13th, 2007
08:52 am

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The Obvious News Story
Yes, yes, we've all heard about the genetically-altered cats that glow in the dark. Which is, undeniably, cool. If I had a glow-in-the-dark cat, I'd be fucking with people's heads all day:

"Yeah, this house came real cheap. It was built on an old radioactive dump site, but the EPA cleared that right up, so I got a perfectly good house for a song. Sure, they told me that there might be residual radiation, but I don't believe it. Hang on, let me get the lights."

But the whole "glowing cat" thing begs the question of what sorts of scientific laboratories are taking their cue from rave parties. I imagine conversations going something like this:

"Wilson! How's the spider that shoots silly string out of its ass coming along?"

"Sir, it's just not working. We're making progress on the breakdancing poodle, though."

"And the Ecstacy-producing toad?"

"Nothing. But good news on the glowing cat...."

(Tell me I'm full of it)

Comments
 
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From:[info]theferrett
Date:December 13th, 2007 03:12 pm (UTC)
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I know all of this.

This is why you will never write comedy, EDT.
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From:[info]bonerici
Date:December 13th, 2007 03:20 pm (UTC)
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my life is a comedy.
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From:[info]suburbfabulous
Date:December 13th, 2007 02:24 pm (UTC)
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Heh.
Breakdancing poodle.
Heh.
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From:[info]babymonkey
Date:December 13th, 2007 03:26 pm (UTC)
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I will ignore your entire post and instead squee about the tangentially related fact that Viggo is nominated for a Golden Globe!!

Ahem... *squee!*

That is all.
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From:[info]babymonkey
Date:December 13th, 2007 03:27 pm (UTC)
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...which was supposed to go on your Oscars post. Oh well.
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From:[info]rowena742
Date:December 13th, 2007 03:38 pm (UTC)
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Sheesh. You'd think the toad would be the easiest one.

Although I contend that whoever came up with this idea is sick of tripping over their black cat at 5 am. I know I am.
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From:[info]argonel
Date:December 13th, 2007 04:21 pm (UTC)
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Unfortunately from what I read the cats don't actually glow as such. Instead the flouesce when in the presence of UV light. This makes them less useful from the not tripping over them perspective, but it does support the rave theory of scientific advancement.
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From:[info]hookncrook
Date:December 13th, 2007 04:32 pm (UTC)
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They arlready had glow-in-the-dark bunnies...I swear these cats are going to get eaten by owls and coyotes so fast where I live.
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From:[info]samayam
Date:December 13th, 2007 04:40 pm (UTC)

Yuck

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I realize this is sort of morbid, but the article says that one of the three cats was stillborn, so in that picture one of those three cats is dead. I think it's the one on the left.

That's kinda creepy.
From:[info]diatryma
Date:December 14th, 2007 02:23 am (UTC)

Re: Yuck

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My money's on the right, because it doesn't glow. Unless this is a new crop of kittens, which would make much more sense in terms of publicity photo.
From:[info]sevenslashfour
Date:December 13th, 2007 05:01 pm (UTC)
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Thank you for making my otherwise dull, overcast day. You won me at the spider bit.
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From:[info]williaej
Date:December 13th, 2007 05:40 pm (UTC)
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What's even more fun to think about is the customization possibilities. Glowing animals (and other organisms) are usually made by incorporating the gene for production of Green Fluorescent Protein (GFP) into the genome of the animal. However, scientists have come up with a number of other fluorescent proteins, including red and blue proteins. With the right breeding, you could have your RaveCatz(TM)* available in any color or shade you desire. Imagine, Pastel Persians, or Cerulean Siamese! It won't be long before the technology shifts into dogs, giving us the limited edition Paris Hilton That's Hot Pink Chihuahua(TM).

(This post brought to you by gross oversimplification of complex science by people who know too much.)

*And yes, they would only light up under blacklight. It's not an autofluorescent protein.
From:[info]diatryma
Date:December 14th, 2007 02:25 am (UTC)
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I interviewed at a school that included a lab studying air pollution by looking at old ice. They had a bunch of Greenland ice, but it was pretty useless for statistical purposes because it was so clean.
So one of them brought it to a party in a cooler. With a chisel.
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From:[info]capybyra
Date:December 14th, 2007 07:31 am (UTC)

IIRC any xenogenetic material that express a macro change is ...

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Rather ungood for the genetic stability of the altered critters,
In degrees of impact often quite nonlinear and devastatingly deadly.Which is A Very Good Thing else the Earmice would be unkillable by cats that would be heard pre-pounce.
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