Book Review #86: Sex Parties 101
Contrary to popular belief, my wife and I have a reasonably mundane sex life. There’s no poly in our pool, and we’re not swingers. I’m just interested in the culture, is all.

But I do like reading about mundane details of bizarre lifestyles. I own a book on firebreathing. I have a book on how to become a porn star. And so when I saw a book on “How to hold a sex party,” well, you had me at hello.

I was curious about how one goes about holding a sex party… And more importantly, what are the little details that go into holding a good sex party? What sort of hors d’oeuvres does one serve? How do you find the right guests? How does one prepare the house for a big ol’ swingin’ fuckfest, and how do you get people started?

Imagine my surprise when I got it from Amazon and realized this was a book on gay sex parties.

But you know, like I said, I’m always interested in other cultures. So I read it anyway. I don’t know nearly enough about the mechanics of gay sex as I probably should, and gay orgies? Well, I know even less. So I read.

What I got was a surprisingly gay book. In fact, it’s aggressively gay. Every paragraph is studded with at least one reference to the joys of cocksucking, fisting, or otherwise male-on-male pleasure; this is a book that delights in the joys of gay sex, and goes out of its way to remind you why you’re here.

It struck me as being a little weird stylistically, but it works because the author’s so matter-of-fact about sex. He obviously enjoys it, and manages to maintain a similarly-aggressive positive tone about sex throughout the entire book. The message is Yes, sex can get complicated sometimes, but it’s still fun – come in and join us!

As for the book, well, I was a little disappointed, since the intersections of “gay” and “hetero” culture are fairly slim, and I learned nothing about the sorts of sex parties a man of my tendencies would hold. Some of the tidbits were universal, and interesting – for example, you want simple snacks because people are eating not for pleasure, but to replenish their bodies for a second go-round. Porn on the TV is fine, but it should be quiet, since the over-the-top performer noises often overshadow or suppress the real thing. And, of course, you have the eternal issue of people standing around, waiting for someone else to make the first move.

But gay culture is different. He seems to think nothing of finding three or four men at a bar and just having sex with them (and yes, this was written in 2005). Apparently, the problem with gay orgies is not finding one, but not stumbling across one, since apparently gay folks are just floppin’ it wherever. (Of course, that could be a side effect of the overwhelmingly sex-positive tome, but the book assumes that you’ll have no trouble finding participants.)

It was neat, however, to get an overview of a lot of the mechanics of gay sex, even if it struck me as slightly odd to have whole chapters devoted to anal sex and bondage in a (rather slim) sex party book. It was an interesting look into a life I don’t lead.

That said, the best part of this book was when I kept forgetting what I was reading, and left it in the bathroom as though it were any other book. Which I did during the entire weekend, meaning that anyone who used the toilet during the “I-Shoulda-Seen-That-By-Now Movie Marathon” no doubt was wondering what the hell I was up to.

Well, now you know.

Book Review #87: Delta Green: Eyes Only, by Dennis Detwiller and company
Delta Green is the best roleplaying supplement ever; it’s what X-Files should have been, the intersection between the hard-edged field of intelligence and the blurred reality-horror of H.P. Lovecraft. You have scientists trying to crack the unknowable, and men in crisp black suits trying to infiltrate cultist enclaves.

Delta Green was the core book, but there were three limited-edition chapbooks released that became instant eBay items. Each of these books fleshed out a specific area of the Delta Green universe, and they immediately went for $75 a pop online. Which is a lot for thirty-two pages.

Eyes Only collects these books into one volume, with some additional scenarios. It’s all quite good stuff, even though I’d read two-thirds of it before and the part about the Grays (a.k.a. “The Fungi From Yuggoth”) is the weakest stuff.

Still, if you’ve never read Delta Green, this isn’t the place to start; get the core rulebook. And if you have, you probably own this already.

(Tell me I'm full of it)